Going through the Adoption Process

by Michele Fried Many pregnant women considering adoption (expectant parents) wonder what the process is like for prospective adoptive parents. When prospective adoptive parents walk through the doors of Adoption STAR, just like our expectant parents, they first meet with an agency staff person to get to know each other. They also have paperwork to fill out to become a client and then they have more paperwork to complete for a process known as a “home study” which is an assessment process one must go through to be considered as adoptive parents. No one can adopt a child without first successfully completing a home study. The home study is actually

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The Wait for Jenny

by Michele Fried When Cindy* and Tom* first came to Adoption S.T.A.R. they already had many adoption experiences. Unfortunately none of them were positive. Cindy and Tom first joined a local adoption support group where they met several couples that successfully adopted. They listened to the many stories and followed the advice of many new adoptive parents, but they either weren’t at the right place at the right time or they just were not making progress going the private adoption route. In addition, Cindy and Tom still dealt with the grief of losing a premature baby who was born to them after years of fertility treatments. The loss of this

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The Power of Words

by Michele Fried Those of you, who know me well, know I love quotes. I guess I am a quote collector if there is such a thing. I love quotes from famous people and from those known by just a few. I love words and the meanings they possess. I love how sometimes just a few words can affect so many people and give them insight and inspiration. I was reading something my cousin wrote to his daughter. He posted it on her blog. His daughter is 26 and lives overseas as she is in what some consider the holy land studying to become a clergy. He writes to her

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Adoption Will Change Your Life

by Michele Fried We are talking on the telephone when my friend casually mentions that she and her husband are planning on adopting. “We’re just beginning the adoption process,” she says. “Any advice?” she asks. “Adoption will change your life.” I simply say. “I know,” she says, “The home study process, waiting for the right baby, and then when the baby comes no more sleeping through the night…” But that is not what I meant. I think of my friend, trying to decide what else to say to her. I want her to know what she will never learn in reading adoption books. I want to tell her that while

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Resources for Family Members of Expectant Parents Making an Adoption Plan

by Kathy Crissey, MS, LMHC Hopes, dreams and expectations – we all have them – not just for ourselves but for our children. What happens when your son or daughter is facing an unexpected pregnancy and is looking for support and guidance?  Where do extended family members turn?  It seems that the focus is on the birth parent and rightfully so. However, swirling around this birth parent are often family members who have their own feelings and needs. A first grandchild – maybe you have dreamed what this would be like and look forward to having this experience. How does an unplanned pregnancy change your hopes and dreams? Maybe this

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Our Home Study is Done – Now What?

by Kathy Crissey, MS, LMHC The home study is done and our profile book is in to the agency – now what? The adoption journey is often one that can seem overwhelming at the beginning and full of things to do. Paperwork, paperwork, and more paperwork. Classes, educational credits, meeting with the social worker and possibly getting a nursery ready are all things that keep you engaged in the adoption process. Then suddenly, everything seems to be done. Now come the questions from caring friends and family, “how is it going?”, “have you heard anything?”, “when do you think you will have a baby?” No matter what you do your

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A Unique Relationship

by Kathy Crissey, MS, LMHC Adoption STAR’s Director of Adoption Kathy Crissey suggests some important considerations for relationship development between prospective adoptive parents and birth parents prior to a potential placement. There may be an opportunity for a relationship to develop between a birth parent(s) and adoptive parent(s) prior to the birth of a child. These beginnings are often the early stages of what will eventually be a life long relationship. The interactions you have will set the stage for further communication and will help all parties involved to begin the process of getting comfortable with each other and getting to know one another. It is safe to say that

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